“Personal authenticity leads us to abandon the masks and masquerades we do not truly own, so that we can embrace and celebrate our most central character. We give up only the laborious task of playing games. In fact we simplify our lives. One face greets every situation without embarrassment or regret. Rather than rehearse the 'right' response, we can trust ourselves by allowing the response we feel in any given moment.”

~ Barry Kaufman

A good friend and one of the most authentic people I have ever known shared this quote with me the other day. You know, every now and then someone will come along with a key word or phrase that exactly identifies what you feel and believe. “Personal authenticity” does that for me.

Sometimes maybe I tell y'all too much about me. Maybe there are some things one should just keep to oneself. But I can't seem to help myself. Authenticity seems to make life work the right ways.

I first discovered this after I had moved from the home I had owned for over twenty years and from the only home my only son ever knew. I moved from that house to a rental. I discovered authenticity when a good friend asked me why I moved.

“So why did you move?” she asked.

I paused for a moment, laboriously trying to cover my tracks and play games. And suddenly, from out of nowhere came my abandonment of masks and masquerades. I stood up straight and proud, looked my friend squarely in the eyes and uttered the words that set me free.

“I lost the home to foreclosure,” I told my friend.

I had never felt such freedom. Not as a 16-year-old when I learned to drive the '64 Bonneville. Not when I left home as an older teen to live the college life. Not when I finished school. Not when I got my first paycheck. Not even when the ex-wife left and when I turned both toilet seats to the upright positions. For the first time in my life, after answering my friend's question truthfully and boldly, I was “authentic.” It caught some folks off guard, to be sure. It surely did my friend that day. But, damn, it felt good and right.

You know, when one works for oneself, one often dons masks and masquerades. When things go awry in the professional world, our first instinct seems to be one of less than authentic values. I have witnessed such values many times. And frankly, I have lied in such situations. You know, back when I was a pro.

But there was one time, a few years ago now, when I screwed up big time. A client came to the studio where I was working to do some rather difficult work. It took hours of his time to do this work. But there was a problem that wasn't discovered until the client finished his job and went away. The problem could have been avoided if I had only done my job completely and correctly.

When the problem was discovered, I sought the advice of a few colleagues. Each of them began to spew out possible excuses I could use to fix the problem and save face at the same time. I totally understood where they were coming from. In the professional world, one cannot make mistakes. Mistakes are caused by others or by uncontrollable circumstances.

I chose honesty. I called the client, admitted my mistake and apologized for the inconvenience of having to redo the work.

I have never known a client to appreciate me more than the one who was on the other end of the phone that day. She thanked me over and over again for my honesty. She knew she was dealing with someone who had her company's best interests at heart. And, like me and my professional colleagues, she too knew that folks screw up sometimes.

Authentic. That what that was.

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